^ That’s a parody of Wreck-it-Ralph’s “I don’t wanna be the bad guy anymore”
I’m bummed. So it’s a good time to write. Let it all out. Figure things out.
Side rants before I blog:
A few of my friends have started/restarted their blogs since the new year started. WUT, DOES EVERYONE BLOG NOW?! Jenny Elle & 5phl. I’m slowing down on my blogging and suddenly these people are getting all insightful and down with the written word. It doesn’t make me want to blog more. It makes me want to blog better. But I’m tired of blogging better :S I just wanna blah blah my life Q__Q
Okay. Side rant done.
So, I came across one of my friend’s sites today. And I got bummed. I don’t think much of this person…he’s lazy. Cheap. Rude. Obnoxious. And then I saw his site. And it was really good. Really really good. Visually much better than mine. And then I saw the code. It was good. I can do better, but it was very good. I couldn’t do what he did 2 to 3 years ago. I was surprised, but suspicious. He said he did the site himself. This person, whom I don’t respect, can pull off such a feat of design and development? Have I been too quick to judge? Is my intuition wrong?
I look at his code…and I’m in shock. How can this be? A beautiful page of code, proper indenting, CSS, everything just like me. The sign of a developer who cares.
And then I see it:
<font color=”#005b97″>Some text</font>
And I realize…any person who codes such beautiful code, uses proper CSS, would never do a <font> tag.
Even to be lazy, a person of such skill would choose to do <span style=”color:#005b97″>Some text</span>. Or better yet, assign a class to it. The <font> tag would NOT be used.
And then I realize: He didn’t do the site. But he did that <font> code. He said he did the site, but the extent of HIS skill is there. <font> is his skill-level. He’s a phony.
And I realize: How much of his site is a lie then? His portfolio is littered with huge companies, Future Shop, Toys R Us, Sears, etc…but all his portfolio content is really a one pager. Did he take imagery off the internet, put it in some Flash and claim it’s his to get hired on big freelance projects? Is that why he makes 1XX/hour on Freelance projects? Because his portfolio is so great, despite how much of it may be truly his or not.
I mean, I could create a one-pager website using images from Google, slap on an “Employed by Blizzard” and who would know? But I don’t. That’s not my style. Lying’s not my style.
But it bums me out because…have I taken the wrong approach?
Does lying to succeed in life justify the negative morality?
I don’t believe it does. But I’m left questioning: has being honest been truly detrimental to my life? I find that having a conscience is detrimental to good people. Because a good person will feel bad about doing a bad thing. But a bad person will not feel bad doing a bad thing. And thus, the bad person…doesn’t feel bad, and is thus, happier.
The only hope that I have is that karma will set the rights in the world. But even that thought is somewhat a wish that bad things will happen to bad people, because they deserve it. And good people don’t think that. Maybe I’m just a bad person with the conscience of a good person. Now THAT would be bad…for me.
I’ve seen it time and time again. The corrupt. Those that abuse power. I try to put my head down and work…but sometimes, I just don’t feel that honesty will get as far as dishonesty. A person that pays $30 for an item is $60 poorer than the thief that steals the same item (..i hope that didn’t go over anyone’s head).
I’m not saying I want to lie and cheat and be dishonest.
I’m just saying…sometimes it’s tough being a good person when people around you aren’t.